Can you define your style? What is your go-to signaturestyle? Do you know? If you don't, that doesn't necessarily mean you don't have one. It just means you may not be aware you have one.
Every woman has a fashion "comfort zone" or happy place. A good place to start is to go look in your closet. What do you see? You'll probably notice an excess of something. Is there an item that seems to dominate your closet? Do you have a ton of cardigan sweaters? Maybe it's jeans. Maybe it's pencil skirts. Maybe it's oversized sweaters. Maybe it's maxi dresses. When we find a "staple" item that fits into our comfort zone, we tend to buy it over and over because it's familiar. The key is... to find out if YOUR staple item is an asset to your style.... or not.
Try on those dominant items and look in a full-length mirror. How do you feel in it?... confident?, powerful?, comfortable? insecure?, glamourous?, sexy?, frumpy? Age appropriate? If the emotions you feel are good, build on that. If they aren't good....maybe it's time to reevaluate your style. If you need help, bring in another set of eyes...that you trust. Try on some things for a spouse or close friend. Get their opinion. Only ask someone you feel completely comfortable with, someone who won't be harsh....but will be honest. Keep the items that illicit positive emotions. Our clothes, how we feel in them, shows through our body language when we wear them more than we realize. If someone is hiding under big, oversized sweaters... they may be broadcasting insecurity without realizing it. When we put something on that makes us feel confident and beautiful...it shows through in our personalities.
Some don't think that clothing matters. It does. It's how we present ourselves to the world. We have to feel comfortable with the clothing we wear though. Two women can wear the same outfit and have completely different experiences. You've probably heard people say..."she can pull that off". Think of it like this... one woman could be wearing a daring sheer blouse with an appropriate, beautiful undergarment.... but you notice she's tugging at it; fidgeting with it, her posture is a little hunched. Take that woman's twin sister...same outfit, but this woman is standing tall, smiling, emanating confidence. Which woman can "pull it off"? An outfit can look great on, but it's the way it makes you feel that determines if you should keep it.
If you absolutely don't know what your personal style is, you can always find one! Or maybe you're reevaluating the one you have if it doesn't fit your lifestyle anymore. Who's style do you admire? Think of family members, friends, celebrities.... what genres do you like? One of my biggest style icons is my mom. That's her in the photo. When my dad was a photographer back in the 60's and early 70's she was often his muse. I know I got my sense of style from her. I was born in 1972, but I've always said that I should have been an adult in the 70's. I've always been drawn to the styles from that time. I absolutely love a great fitting jumpsuit. I feel fantastic in them. I "jumped" on them when they came back "in". I have three black jumpsuits in my closet, all different fits that work for different situations....I love them all. That's one reason I love Rachel Zoe... she has that 70's vibe to her that you can feel she is comfortable with. Once you identify who's style you like, study them, what do they wear? Try on some things... how do you feel? A mix is okay... whatever comes out of it will end up being your own personal style that makes YOU feel confident.
With all of this said, don't think that you have to be a size 2 for this to work for you. Covering up in an oversized sweater can sometimes make you appear heavier than if you wear tops that accentuate your natural shape. There are great resources out there in shows like "What Not To Wear"...and Nordstrom has personal shoppers that you can make an appointment with that will help you (no charge!) Many shops have knowledgable staff that are happy to help give you advice if you ask. Just feel them out and make sure they're not just trying to make a sale by telling you everything looks great!! Trust your instincts. It's very helpful to take a friend with you that you trust when you shop if you're unsure....until you feel more confident in what you're looking for.
Make sure your personal style fits your lifestyle. What do you do on a daily basis? Are you a housewife with small kids and rarely leave the house? Do you have a job and work 60 hours a week? Are you a social butterfly that goes out on the town 3 nights a week dancing? Make sure it's a good fit. Otherwise things will just hang in your closet and never be worn. A helpful tool when shopping is calculating the "cost per wear".
If this is new to you, this can take time...continue to work on it. In time, you will be able to get dressed more easily because you have a go-to signature style that works for you. You'll feel comfortable in your own skin...it will show. You'll be able to face the world saying "This is who I am".
