Never stop being your husband's girlfriend. What an interesting quote. When I saw this on Pinterest the other day...it really resonated with me.
As 'girlfriends', we put in some serious work toward our relationships. This should not stop when we become wives. Sadly, it often does...
My husband and I are starting out 2015 better than ever. We have been together for more than a decade...married for almost 5 years...and I love him just as much as the day I married him. With that said, all marriages ebb and flow a little, some a lot. The one thing I know that is not a strong suit, for both of us, is really voicing our minds when it comes to our wants and needs from the other person. Our life coach often tells me to "state your case and claim your space!" He's always known that it's something I need to work on. So many times, as women, we think that our body language or tone completely communicates what we want or need. We think our husband's should be able to read our minds...we should know by now that doesn't work.
Lately, I asked my husband to talk because I could feel us "coasting" a little too much in our marriage. NOT to say we weren't happy by any means...but could we do better? Yes, yes we can. We are people that don't tolerate mediocrity from ourselves...we want to be the best we can be. We both have to remember that starts at home...with us.
Marriage takes work. Sometimes we forget to put in that work and start taking the other person for granted. I never thought that would be me. I didn't get married until I was 38 years old because I was waiting for my perfect man. I'm so grateful to have him as my husband. He's such an amazing man, wonderful father, and is my very best friend. I've never stopped feeling that, but I need to remember to tell him...show him...every day.
That talk we had wasn't easy. But something has happened since that talk that has turned a light on in our marriage again that had felt a little dim. I feel like we've started out 2015 with a new beginning. I feel like the couple we want to be again. I can tell that we are both putting in the work, every day, and it's been wonderful. It's amazing how such a small shift can make such a huge difference.
This quote is something I am going to add to my goal board because it will act as a small daily reminder...to never "coast" again.
....If you're reading this right now, take a moment to ask yourself, "Am I coasting in my marriage?" Think back to the early days of your relationship when you really put the work into letting that other person know how much you cared. What could you do to get back there? The great thing is, it's usually not a huge gesture that's missing. It's the love note left for them when they're not expecting it....the small gift for no reason that shows that you were thinking of them...the undivided attention you give them (get off your phone!)...the loving touch or snuggle (that doesn't always lead to sex)...the genuine compliments...the encouragement they still need to hear...it's all these small things that make them feel loved. I told my husband I needed to feel loved again. Since then, I've made sure I've made him feel loved every day,and guess what?...he's making sure I feel loved too.
Your spouse is the most important person in your life. They should be your best friend...taking on the world together as a team. Don't let life with them slip into "autopilot". Marriage is meant to be extraordinary...not blah and redundant. Don't "coast" any longer...and never stop being your husband's girlfriend.