Life Changes: How To Gain Perspective

perspective What a week!  I had one of my very oldest friends from high school come see me.  My stepson went back to college after spending the summer at home.  To top it all off...we had an earthquake here in Northern California!

All these things together got me thinking about change.  It got me thinking about how many changes I've gone through since high school.  It got me thinking about all the changes my stepsons are going through.  It got me thinking about how life can change in an instant...when we least expect it.

Life is full of changes.  No one really loves change.  Dealing with changes can be uncomfortable, even scary, because there are a lot of "unknowns".  A great way to deal with life changes is to get perspective on life.  Gaining perspective is key.  It often makes the difference between resisting or accepting the new changes that are happening in your life.  So how do we do that?

  • Get Away.  New places, new faces and new experiences can help you gain perspective.  It can help you break out of a rut you may be in and can help you clear your mind.  Traveling someplace new can help you get away from the contents of your everyday life and therefore the "change" that has happened may not seem quite as uncomfortable, scary or sad anymore.
  • Surround yourself with positive people.  This is something we should all do anyway, but is especially important during times of change.  This includes yourself and your own self-talk.  If you were your own best friend, what advice would you give yourself?  Remember that you would probably offer words of encouragement.
  • Do something fun.  Allowing yourself to enjoy and receive pleasure in life creates new pathways for openings and inspiration.  It elevates your mood and energy, giving you greater perspective on what happened and what's possible. It frees up stuck energy.
  • Be healthy.  When we're under great amounts of stress, it's easy to fall of the bandwagon, stop exercising and eat unhealthy foods. This can throw us off balance.  Staying healthy can help us make the right decisions.  Notice exercise sounds a lot like "exorcise."  Moving can help us purge our tension and inner demons.  Being healthy keeps us in flow.
  • Spend time alone.  When you're going through major life changes, being alone may be the last thing you really want to do.  Often times we want to fill up empty space we feel with TV or an overly-chatty friend.  Being around too many people and ideas can drown out the still, inner voice that resides within you when you are quiet.  Spend time in nature, take walks, trust what feels right.  These are often the times we receive guidance that may lead to your next step.  Sometimes looking at something bigger than us...can make us feel small.  This can help us realize that whatever difficult change we are going through isn't really as big as we think it is.  It always seems SO important...until it doesn't.  Perspective is key.

These are just a few ways that can help you gain perspective in times of change...wanted and unwanted change.  Sometimes we have to make hard choices in life, I know I have.  Sometimes change is unexpected.  Either way, hopefully these tools can help with the process.

I can't write about change without mentioning this....A GREAT tool to learn about life changes is the book "Who Moved My Cheese" by Spencer Johnson, M.D.  It's a simple story about  two mice named Sniff and Scurry, and two "Littlepeople" named Hem and Haw who live in a maze and they look for cheese to make them happy.  The "cheese" is a metaphor for the things we want in life and the "maze" is where we look for what we want.  In the story, the characters are faced with unexpected change.  It is written for all ages and it's unique insights can last a lifetime.  A wonderful book for the whole family.

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Life will always be full of changes.  Those changes don't have to cause stress if we have tools to make dealing with them easier.  Those changes could be a blessing in disguise.  Those changes could be an opportunity to grow.  Just remember, whatever changes you face in life, they aren't permanent.

-Some of the bulletpoints above are based on an article written by Huffpost Healthy Living.  

How Gratitude Can Change Your Life

gratidude Gratitude helps us gain perspective when we are feeling unhappy or unsatisfied with our lives.  Sometimes we can lose sight of what's really important...understandably so, with all the distractions nowadays.  Learning to use gratitude as a tool can make a dramatically positive impact on our lives.

It's easy to feel gratitude when things are going our way and we are happy.  What about when things are not going our way?  Harder, isn't it?  We tend to succumb to frustration.  So what can we do to turn things around in our favor quickly?  GRATITUDE.

It's actually difficult to focus on the negative when we are feeling grateful.  The key to making gratitude a habit is to feel grateful regardless of your circumstances.  There is always going to be "ups" and "downs" in life.  That's okay!  What we don't realize, is that those "ups" and "downs" are part of life.  If we didn't experience the "downs", we wouldn't know how good the "ups" feel!   We NEED that contrast to navigate and learn what we want in life.  We need that contrast to grow.  We shouldn't let our feelings of gratitude be dictated by what's going on in our lives at that moment.  Find gratitude in every moment.  By changing this one thing, it can make a HUGE impact on what we attract into our lives.

How can gratitude benefit our lives?  In order to attract more of what we want, we must be in what is called an "attitude of gratitude", because gratitude is essential to put the Law of Attraction into motion, a universal law that states that whatever you focus on is what you're going to get, whether you want it or not.  (I'm not elaborating on this because I've written a blog post about this in more detail, click on the link above to learn more...I recommend it!)

So how do we do this?  At first, we tend to be thankful for things.  That's a great place to start, but when we make gratitude a habit...we move to feeling grateful for life itself.  We start moving in this direction by being grateful for waking up every day, breathing, the love we feel, and our failures.  Yes, our mistakes and failures.  Be grateful for them...it means you tried and you're better for it.  Be grateful for that.  Once we make this a habit, we are grateful for not only things...we are grateful to just be.

One way to practice making gratitude a part of your life is to silently list what you are grateful for in your life...right when you wake up.  When we sleep, our minds "reset" so to speak.  We release negativity when we sleep by releasing resistance.  For this reason, it's easier to feel gratitude at this time.  Keep your eyes closed for just a few moments and think about all the things you are grateful for.  Starting each day in this way will put you in a better frame of mind and you will start noticing the positive benefits.

Another way to remind you throughout the day to feel gratitude is with a "gratitude rock".  Find a smooth rock that feels good in your hand.  Make it special.  Keep this gratitude rock with you at all times, in your pocket or purse....somewhere you will come across it at least a few times a day.  When you touch it, take a moment to hold it, roll it around in your hand.  As you do, think of what you are grateful for...what you have already.  Remember, don't think about what you "lack"...think about what you are grateful for.   When you go to bed, put it by your bed or somewhere you will see it first thing, so you don't forget to take it with you.

If we can find a way to have gratitude in each moment, our lives will improve dramatically.  Learn to begin each day and live each moment in gratitude...then watch your life transform.

The more you are in a state of gratitude, the more you will attract things to be grateful for.

Frenchie Friday - Happy Birthday Stella!

IMG_5470 Happy Frenchie Friday!  "Stella" celebrated her 8th birthday yesterday!  She has had this birthday cake toy for quite a few years now and she never fails to get it out for her birthday.  It was actually a little eerie the first time she did that.  It used to play the Happy Birthday song, but that broke from all the fetching...it is now silent, which isn't a bad thing after hearing it too many times;)

She has since moved on to her new birthday present, this new turkey...that gobbles when you shake it and has "rope legs" for chewing...that's a big smile!!

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It's hard to believe she's already eight, but she's truly a puppy at heart...and that's what matters, right?  Not that she's super old, but people always ask if she's a puppy.  She lives life to the fullest, plays daily, lives in the moment, doesn't worry about her age...we can learn something from our pets how to enjoy life more.  

Age is just a number.  We are only as old as we feel.  Stella and I wish you a youthful, FUN Frenchie Friday!!!

Happiness is...falling asleep with your new toy still in your mouth...so tuckered.

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Frenchie Friday!

Stella-gator Happy Frenchie Friday!  Stella got a new gift recently from her auntie Stephanie...this gator.  She loves him and carries him everywhere she goes.  This just cracked me up the other day when she set him down and proceeded to lie down right next to him.

I've never seen a dog take care of her toys like Stella does.  When she gets a new one she gives it undivided attention for about a week.  Then she adds it to the mix and gives them all equal time...she loves and plays with them all.  As you can see "Gator" is still in his initiation period...

Have a fantastic Frenchie Friday everyone....remember to take care of the ones you love.

Thanks Steph!